Thanks. Giving.

Thanks...

Thankful that I am 30. Why shouldn't I be? What an amazing thing. People didn't use to live this long in the past. I can't wait to begin this chapter. For life, I am thankful.

My husband. Wow. What an amazing man. No one knows him the way I do. The wonderful person I am fortunate enough to call my husband...he has brought joy in immeasurable ways to me. For Michael, I am thankful.

ETA

Our estimated time of arrival into our first home has been delayed. Indefinitely.
We received word there was a second mortgage that was NOT foreclosed on the home we are buying. Crap. That means we are waiting. Indefinitely. Again. Crap.

God knows what He is doing.

This is my new mantra.

Reconnecting

Today and really, this week, has been such a wonderful time of reconnecting.

I finally got back in touch with my sweet grandmother this morning when I woke up. I had been repeatedly calling her over the last couple of months and had been unable to get her on the phone. Today I finally got to talk to her and reestablish conversation about how she is doing and what is happening in her world. She was so very pleased to report that she had been winning Bingo and prizes at the senior center. So cute!! I miss her so bad but it was so great to talk to her and hear her smile...

Ever felt too blessed?

Wow, today has been a whirlwind!

I got notification that I have been offered a job with the State of Florida doing the same work I was doing in Tennessee. This is a great relief and very exciting to me, as I loved that job!

After receiving word about that job, I was telling Michael the news and he insisted that I go get some new clothes for work since all of my dress clothes are still in storage. So I found some great deals with my mother in law while we were out and about today.

When we got back this afternoon, I checked my email. Lo and behold, all kinds of things had developed while I was gone! We got a copy of our signed contract on the house, meaning that I have to find an inspector and get that completed.

I got another email from the worship leader at our church asking me to come to rehearsal tomorrow night since someone who was scheduled this week will not be able to do it.

This Saturday I will be contributing my talents and efforts to a service project with the other 20 and 30 year olds at our church. We will be gathering monthly to do service projects in the community. These kinds of outreach are so close to my heart. This week's mission is to help out at a local soup kitchen and I can't wait to get in there and contribute to making a real difference!

I feel incredibly blessed. I know that I always have been but today I see clearly that God is listening to our needs and desires. Not only is He is listening, He is acting!!! Yay! It's so awesome to know that you always have someone working on your behalf...even when you are frustrated, discouraged, annoyed, and impatient.

Thank you, Father, for taking care of us when we are not even conscious you are doing it!

Honeymoon, belated

My sweet husband took me on a weekend getaway to Fort Myers for our one year anniversary this past weekend. We never had a honeymoon after our wedding so this was our first "vacation" together as a married couple. It really ended up feeling like a honeymoon.

We played putt putt, toured the Edison & Ford museum, played putt putt again, and had some nice dinners out. Michael took me to watch the sunset on the beach and to Cold Stone Creamery on the night of our anniversary! :-D Most importantly, we were able to relax and get away from all of the stress that has attempted to take over our lives lately, i.e. buying a house, Michael's work, finding a job for me, etc. What joy! (I took lots of pics on my phone but I will have to wait until we move to upload them!!)

It's amazing how you don't really have to go that far from home to get away from it all. Just book a hotel room and relax as if you were thousands of miles away from everything!!

Love defined

1 John 4:8- "Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love."

My first anniversary of wedded bliss with my amazing husband is fast approaching and it has me reflecting on our marriage and what love means to me.

This week I decided to do something special for my husband and send him a message every day, telling him something about our marriage that shows love. I loved doing this because it really made me consciously think about what it is about our marriage that works and why it works so well for us.

It got me thinking about how we love one another, not just Michael and I as a couple but all of us on this little planet called Earth. How we love one another as friends, family, strangers, coworkers, etc. Then, of course, I thought about how God love us all. He loves us as if He were blind. A blind love. Acceptance of us as we are. Love for us even when we are wrong, selfish, etc. This is the kind of love that Michael shows me every single day. What a blessing!

I try my best to love completely and with all of my heart. At times, this has been to a fault and has caused me a lot of pain before in relationships with family, romantic relationships, friends, and even strangers. But by knowing God the way I do, I see that to love fully and completely is to strive to be more like Him. He has blessed me with a wonderful companion in this life. And I can truly say that I LOVE him more now than the day I married him.

Money isn't everything

This blog may come off as a little preachy, but I am telling you in advance that I don't mean for it to be that way. I am going to free write this so I get out what I want to say on this topic.

In the last year of marriage, my husband has worked full-time (and then some) to make money for us to live on. He told me he wanted to do this for me after we got married since I had moved to FL and was therefore unemployed. He makes a decent wage but we are, by no means, rich. We have always had food, shelter, and each other. Until I was able to step away from work life, I couldn't appreciate how little money actually means to us as a couple. I truly believe if we had to, we could survive on practically no money.

In doing that, I have realized how little money people really need to live on. Keep in mind, our circumstances are different because we don't have children. While I won't discuss our personal finances in detail, I will say that in the last year I have come to notice there really has been no need to go shopping, eat dinners out, get new clothes, buy trinkets, etc. as much as we Americans do. Trust me, when both Michael and I were working, we did this just as much as anyone else in our country.

Deciding which jobs to apply for, now that I am ready to return to work, often involves looking at salaries for the positions. What they don't tell you in the job description is how much time (on the clock and off) you also have to invest to earn that paycheck. This means time away from your spouse, children (not that we have any yet), other family, and friends.

These are just some observations...take them for what you will.

What a difference a month (or two) makes!

Well, well, well. Where to start.

The short sale home we were hoping for didn't work out. The selling bank's investor decided to pull a last minute increase on the price of the home we were trying to purchase and we decided that it just wasn't worth that to us. So here we are. In Punta Gorda, living with my in laws and no home to call our own.

We have continued our search for a new home and have made many offers but nothing has panned out yet. Michael and I are getting very disillusioned with the real estate buying process and are constantly having to remind ourselves (and each other) that it will all be worth it when we get our home. But morale is very low on that front.

As for my career path, I have interviewed for SO many jobs here it's sickening. Unfortunately for me, the job market here in Florida is flooded with applicants. One job I interviewed for only had 2 positions and there over 300 applicants!!!! When I didn't get the position, the lady on the phone told me I was in the Top 5 of those interviewed. I guess that should have made me feel better, but it really didn't, especially since I knew I was overqualified for that job. It just made it worse to know that I couldn't get a job that I could easily have done. That was what hurt the most.

Most recently, I took a test and interviewed for a position with the State of Florida and am STILL awaiting news as to whether or not I will be offered the position. The job is the same job I was doing in TN working with those who are applying for government assistance but there is an added perk of eventually being able to do it from home. To me this is extremely appealing, especially since Michael and I would like to start a family within the next few years. This would allow me the rare opportunity of being a mother, caring for our child myself, and still being able to bring in a full-time income. Very appealing indeed.

Pretty much and to be frank, I am "chomping at the bit" to see what is going to happen next. This whole "hurry up and wait" stage of life is driving me crazy. To go from such a fast paced existence, to a slower one, to being single for so long, to being married, to hurrying up to get things straightened out to buy a home, then to have the deal change at the last minute, then to test and interview for a job, only then to have to wait for weeks to find out if I am being offered a position........all of it is enough to make a crazy person and sane. And I have to say for me, maybe it's vice versa (if I was truly sane to begin with). :-D

On top of all of that, my in laws are extremely wonderful to let us stay here, but it's difficult for me to be comfortable with this arrangement. Keep in mind, I have lived on my own for 11 years and this to me, is maddening. That is not a reflection on them. Just that I don't have any of my furniture, belongings, or most of my clothes. Everything material (and yes, I recognize that is not what's most important in life!) that I have accumulated in my life is locked away in a storage unit. Along with that, I feel that my identity as a self sufficient, independent person is lost. I have previously judged people my age who were living with family as lazy, moochers, etc. Now I know, and hope you all will see, that is just NOT always the case. Sometimes there are extenuating circumstances that put people in that position that are beyond their control.

And to make me feel even worse, our first wedding anniversary is toward the end of this month, my 30th birthday is in November, and I don't want to still be living here for those events.

I think that's all I have for now...stay tuned.

For a whole new ball of wax...

Well, as you can see from the date of the "First Post", it has been quite sometime since I began this blog and I have slacked in keeping it up to date. This is something that I hope to remedy from here on out.

For those of you who don't know what has transpired over the last 2 years of my life, here is the shortest version I can muster: I got a new job working for the State of TN in the Department of Human Services where I was an Eligibility Counselor and helped those less fortunate than myself get on government assistance for food, child care, and Medicaid. This job was stressful at times but paid the bills and provided me with some job fulfillment, knowing that I was helping real people survive on a daily basis.

Michael got a job and moved to Florida in January 2009. We became engaged on April 11, 2009 when I was in Florida for his birthday. It was sweet, romantic, and wonderful. Then the fun really began. I put in notice at my job that I would be moving to Florida after I got married on September 26, 2009 at a wonderful sunset ceremony at our church in Knoxville, TN. This was indeed the best, most wonderful day of my life thus far.

I then began my period of transition in this life. From being a well-educated, professional, career driven, self-sufficient woman in her late 20s to being a housewife in a region of the country totally foreign to me with nothing to do more often than not. Culture shock indeed. Not just the adjustment to living in Florida instead of Tennessee, which was QUITE an adjustment in and of itself but also to the adjustment of the pace of my life. For most of my life, prior to becoming Mrs. Poole, I had always had so much to do. Not enough hours in the day to get them all done. Hang out with friends, play in local bands, write music, sing at church, spending time with my mother and grandmother...you know, the regular hustle and bustle one's life becomes when you live in the same city for almost a decade. I loved Knoxville and had become comfortable there. Here in Venice, Florida, a town more known for sharks' teeth and geriatrics than the hustle and bustle of city life, I had become unknown. Invisible to anyone and everyone around me, except Michael and his wonderful family, who we were fortunate enough to be located near.

So here I am. In dilemma. I have tried to occupy myself with participating in local theatre but to be honest, as much as it was creatively stimulating, it was just as much taking away from my marriage because I was never seeing Michael due to rehearsals and performances being in the evenings. This is not something I wish to continue to do for free. If nothing else, this life has taught me that my time is valuable. Very valuable. To me and to Michael, and I expect to be compensated well if I am spending time somewhere other than the "home" we created by our marriage. That may sound shallow for some, but it's truly how I feel these days.

We decided to buy a house in the North Port/Port Charlotte area here in Florida. Mostly, we have discovered that renting someone else's house can be more trouble than it's worth when you could just take care of things yourself. Unfortunately for us, the house is a short sale home and that means we could be waiting a while before we are able to move into this beautiful property that we can't wait to live in. So in the meantime, we are moving out of our rental house and into Michael's parents new home in Punta Gorda, about 30 minutes south of Venice. My in-laws are truly wonderful for letting us do this temporarily and I am happy that they are getting so excited about us coming to stay with them.