I am feeling very emotionally exposed as I post this...I am going to say everything you aren't supposed to when it comes to whether or not you are ready to have a baby.
This is a post that I have been wanting to do for sometime now in response to a lot of questions and comments we have received about this particular topic over the last (almost) 3 years of marriage.
Many of you already know, this is a very sensitive topic for me. That is why I have such a hard time responding to your questions when you ask me, "So when are you and Michael gonna have a baby?" It's not a simple answer, so I have concocted a complex, detailed answer here so that I may begin referring people to if those questions don't stop. Maybe business cards with the blog website...hmm. ;-D
For the record (before any misunderstandings and/or hurt feelings begin), I could not be happier for those of you who are enjoying your roles of parenthood or about to become parents for the first time. I am proud to know so many wonderful parents who are sometimes exhausted, are great role models, and love their children. I am truly thrilled for those of you who are expecting and can't wait to see all of the squishy family pictures of the baby when it arrives and the years of family pics and status updates regarding your little families! I am honestly very happy for each and every one of you!
Showing posts with label change. Show all posts
Showing posts with label change. Show all posts
Wednesday, August 8, 2012
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
ETA
Our estimated time of arrival into our first home has been delayed. Indefinitely.
We received word there was a second mortgage that was NOT foreclosed on the home we are buying. Crap. That means we are waiting. Indefinitely. Again. Crap.
God knows what He is doing.
This is my new mantra.
We received word there was a second mortgage that was NOT foreclosed on the home we are buying. Crap. That means we are waiting. Indefinitely. Again. Crap.
God knows what He is doing.
This is my new mantra.
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
What a difference a month (or two) makes!
Well, well, well. Where to start.
The short sale home we were hoping for didn't work out. The selling bank's investor decided to pull a last minute increase on the price of the home we were trying to purchase and we decided that it just wasn't worth that to us. So here we are. In Punta Gorda, living with my in laws and no home to call our own.
We have continued our search for a new home and have made many offers but nothing has panned out yet. Michael and I are getting very disillusioned with the real estate buying process and are constantly having to remind ourselves (and each other) that it will all be worth it when we get our home. But morale is very low on that front.
As for my career path, I have interviewed for SO many jobs here it's sickening. Unfortunately for me, the job market here in Florida is flooded with applicants. One job I interviewed for only had 2 positions and there over 300 applicants!!!! When I didn't get the position, the lady on the phone told me I was in the Top 5 of those interviewed. I guess that should have made me feel better, but it really didn't, especially since I knew I was overqualified for that job. It just made it worse to know that I couldn't get a job that I could easily have done. That was what hurt the most.
Most recently, I took a test and interviewed for a position with the State of Florida and am STILL awaiting news as to whether or not I will be offered the position. The job is the same job I was doing in TN working with those who are applying for government assistance but there is an added perk of eventually being able to do it from home. To me this is extremely appealing, especially since Michael and I would like to start a family within the next few years. This would allow me the rare opportunity of being a mother, caring for our child myself, and still being able to bring in a full-time income. Very appealing indeed.
Pretty much and to be frank, I am "chomping at the bit" to see what is going to happen next. This whole "hurry up and wait" stage of life is driving me crazy. To go from such a fast paced existence, to a slower one, to being single for so long, to being married, to hurrying up to get things straightened out to buy a home, then to have the deal change at the last minute, then to test and interview for a job, only then to have to wait for weeks to find out if I am being offered a position........all of it is enough to make a crazy person and sane. And I have to say for me, maybe it's vice versa (if I was truly sane to begin with). :-D
On top of all of that, my in laws are extremely wonderful to let us stay here, but it's difficult for me to be comfortable with this arrangement. Keep in mind, I have lived on my own for 11 years and this to me, is maddening. That is not a reflection on them. Just that I don't have any of my furniture, belongings, or most of my clothes. Everything material (and yes, I recognize that is not what's most important in life!) that I have accumulated in my life is locked away in a storage unit. Along with that, I feel that my identity as a self sufficient, independent person is lost. I have previously judged people my age who were living with family as lazy, moochers, etc. Now I know, and hope you all will see, that is just NOT always the case. Sometimes there are extenuating circumstances that put people in that position that are beyond their control.
And to make me feel even worse, our first wedding anniversary is toward the end of this month, my 30th birthday is in November, and I don't want to still be living here for those events.
I think that's all I have for now...stay tuned.
The short sale home we were hoping for didn't work out. The selling bank's investor decided to pull a last minute increase on the price of the home we were trying to purchase and we decided that it just wasn't worth that to us. So here we are. In Punta Gorda, living with my in laws and no home to call our own.
We have continued our search for a new home and have made many offers but nothing has panned out yet. Michael and I are getting very disillusioned with the real estate buying process and are constantly having to remind ourselves (and each other) that it will all be worth it when we get our home. But morale is very low on that front.
As for my career path, I have interviewed for SO many jobs here it's sickening. Unfortunately for me, the job market here in Florida is flooded with applicants. One job I interviewed for only had 2 positions and there over 300 applicants!!!! When I didn't get the position, the lady on the phone told me I was in the Top 5 of those interviewed. I guess that should have made me feel better, but it really didn't, especially since I knew I was overqualified for that job. It just made it worse to know that I couldn't get a job that I could easily have done. That was what hurt the most.
Most recently, I took a test and interviewed for a position with the State of Florida and am STILL awaiting news as to whether or not I will be offered the position. The job is the same job I was doing in TN working with those who are applying for government assistance but there is an added perk of eventually being able to do it from home. To me this is extremely appealing, especially since Michael and I would like to start a family within the next few years. This would allow me the rare opportunity of being a mother, caring for our child myself, and still being able to bring in a full-time income. Very appealing indeed.
Pretty much and to be frank, I am "chomping at the bit" to see what is going to happen next. This whole "hurry up and wait" stage of life is driving me crazy. To go from such a fast paced existence, to a slower one, to being single for so long, to being married, to hurrying up to get things straightened out to buy a home, then to have the deal change at the last minute, then to test and interview for a job, only then to have to wait for weeks to find out if I am being offered a position........all of it is enough to make a crazy person and sane. And I have to say for me, maybe it's vice versa (if I was truly sane to begin with). :-D
On top of all of that, my in laws are extremely wonderful to let us stay here, but it's difficult for me to be comfortable with this arrangement. Keep in mind, I have lived on my own for 11 years and this to me, is maddening. That is not a reflection on them. Just that I don't have any of my furniture, belongings, or most of my clothes. Everything material (and yes, I recognize that is not what's most important in life!) that I have accumulated in my life is locked away in a storage unit. Along with that, I feel that my identity as a self sufficient, independent person is lost. I have previously judged people my age who were living with family as lazy, moochers, etc. Now I know, and hope you all will see, that is just NOT always the case. Sometimes there are extenuating circumstances that put people in that position that are beyond their control.
And to make me feel even worse, our first wedding anniversary is toward the end of this month, my 30th birthday is in November, and I don't want to still be living here for those events.
I think that's all I have for now...stay tuned.
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
For a whole new ball of wax...
Well, as you can see from the date of the "First Post", it has been quite sometime since I began this blog and I have slacked in keeping it up to date. This is something that I hope to remedy from here on out.
For those of you who don't know what has transpired over the last 2 years of my life, here is the shortest version I can muster: I got a new job working for the State of TN in the Department of Human Services where I was an Eligibility Counselor and helped those less fortunate than myself get on government assistance for food, child care, and Medicaid. This job was stressful at times but paid the bills and provided me with some job fulfillment, knowing that I was helping real people survive on a daily basis.
Michael got a job and moved to Florida in January 2009. We became engaged on April 11, 2009 when I was in Florida for his birthday. It was sweet, romantic, and wonderful. Then the fun really began. I put in notice at my job that I would be moving to Florida after I got married on September 26, 2009 at a wonderful sunset ceremony at our church in Knoxville, TN. This was indeed the best, most wonderful day of my life thus far.
I then began my period of transition in this life. From being a well-educated, professional, career driven, self-sufficient woman in her late 20s to being a housewife in a region of the country totally foreign to me with nothing to do more often than not. Culture shock indeed. Not just the adjustment to living in Florida instead of Tennessee, which was QUITE an adjustment in and of itself but also to the adjustment of the pace of my life. For most of my life, prior to becoming Mrs. Poole, I had always had so much to do. Not enough hours in the day to get them all done. Hang out with friends, play in local bands, write music, sing at church, spending time with my mother and grandmother...you know, the regular hustle and bustle one's life becomes when you live in the same city for almost a decade. I loved Knoxville and had become comfortable there. Here in Venice, Florida, a town more known for sharks' teeth and geriatrics than the hustle and bustle of city life, I had become unknown. Invisible to anyone and everyone around me, except Michael and his wonderful family, who we were fortunate enough to be located near.
So here I am. In dilemma. I have tried to occupy myself with participating in local theatre but to be honest, as much as it was creatively stimulating, it was just as much taking away from my marriage because I was never seeing Michael due to rehearsals and performances being in the evenings. This is not something I wish to continue to do for free. If nothing else, this life has taught me that my time is valuable. Very valuable. To me and to Michael, and I expect to be compensated well if I am spending time somewhere other than the "home" we created by our marriage. That may sound shallow for some, but it's truly how I feel these days.
We decided to buy a house in the North Port/Port Charlotte area here in Florida. Mostly, we have discovered that renting someone else's house can be more trouble than it's worth when you could just take care of things yourself. Unfortunately for us, the house is a short sale home and that means we could be waiting a while before we are able to move into this beautiful property that we can't wait to live in. So in the meantime, we are moving out of our rental house and into Michael's parents new home in Punta Gorda, about 30 minutes south of Venice. My in-laws are truly wonderful for letting us do this temporarily and I am happy that they are getting so excited about us coming to stay with them.
For those of you who don't know what has transpired over the last 2 years of my life, here is the shortest version I can muster: I got a new job working for the State of TN in the Department of Human Services where I was an Eligibility Counselor and helped those less fortunate than myself get on government assistance for food, child care, and Medicaid. This job was stressful at times but paid the bills and provided me with some job fulfillment, knowing that I was helping real people survive on a daily basis.
Michael got a job and moved to Florida in January 2009. We became engaged on April 11, 2009 when I was in Florida for his birthday. It was sweet, romantic, and wonderful. Then the fun really began. I put in notice at my job that I would be moving to Florida after I got married on September 26, 2009 at a wonderful sunset ceremony at our church in Knoxville, TN. This was indeed the best, most wonderful day of my life thus far.
I then began my period of transition in this life. From being a well-educated, professional, career driven, self-sufficient woman in her late 20s to being a housewife in a region of the country totally foreign to me with nothing to do more often than not. Culture shock indeed. Not just the adjustment to living in Florida instead of Tennessee, which was QUITE an adjustment in and of itself but also to the adjustment of the pace of my life. For most of my life, prior to becoming Mrs. Poole, I had always had so much to do. Not enough hours in the day to get them all done. Hang out with friends, play in local bands, write music, sing at church, spending time with my mother and grandmother...you know, the regular hustle and bustle one's life becomes when you live in the same city for almost a decade. I loved Knoxville and had become comfortable there. Here in Venice, Florida, a town more known for sharks' teeth and geriatrics than the hustle and bustle of city life, I had become unknown. Invisible to anyone and everyone around me, except Michael and his wonderful family, who we were fortunate enough to be located near.
So here I am. In dilemma. I have tried to occupy myself with participating in local theatre but to be honest, as much as it was creatively stimulating, it was just as much taking away from my marriage because I was never seeing Michael due to rehearsals and performances being in the evenings. This is not something I wish to continue to do for free. If nothing else, this life has taught me that my time is valuable. Very valuable. To me and to Michael, and I expect to be compensated well if I am spending time somewhere other than the "home" we created by our marriage. That may sound shallow for some, but it's truly how I feel these days.
We decided to buy a house in the North Port/Port Charlotte area here in Florida. Mostly, we have discovered that renting someone else's house can be more trouble than it's worth when you could just take care of things yourself. Unfortunately for us, the house is a short sale home and that means we could be waiting a while before we are able to move into this beautiful property that we can't wait to live in. So in the meantime, we are moving out of our rental house and into Michael's parents new home in Punta Gorda, about 30 minutes south of Venice. My in-laws are truly wonderful for letting us do this temporarily and I am happy that they are getting so excited about us coming to stay with them.
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